Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark.

The Internet King? I wonder if he could provide faster nudity… Whoa, slow down there, maestro. There’s a *New* Mexico? You don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way.


Books are useless! I only ever read one book, “To Kill A Mockingbird,” and it gave me absolutely no insight on how to kill mockingbirds! Sure it taught me not to judge a man by the color of his skin…but what good does *that* do me?
Marge, just about everything’s a sin. Y’ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we’re not supposed to go to the bathroom.
Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.